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Schools To Swap Sex Education for Sesh Education

Earlier this morning, The Secretary of State for Education announced that they will be rolling out a new programme across the UK to replace the current sex education syllabus.

Covering modules such as ‘Best music for a sesh’ and ‘How to take drugs: A Dummy’s Guide’, The new ‘Sesh Education’ programme hopes to teach kids aged 14+ the best (and safest) way to ‘Sesh’.

Former Education Secretary, Moreen Greysmith had this to say: “Schools currently deliver a very well put together sex education programme, which aims to provide children with knowledge on safe sex. However, in recent years, the programme has slowly become obsolete, as children pick up most of their knowledge from their family and peers. We believed it was more important to begin educating the youth on the best and safest way to Sesh. The programme will cover topics such as drugs, music, dancing and how to properly talk shite at the afters. I firmly believe the programme will serve as a much more useful aspect to our children’s education”.

The people upstairs haveb high hopes for the programme, which has been supported by thousands of parents in a recent poll. However, with new additions to the curriculum, there will no doubt be some controversy.

Mike Whitman, a parent of two isn’t convinced: “It’s ridiculous! I don’t want my children learning how to sesh. Yes, they may learn about the safest way to take drugs, but I don’t want my children being exposed to that type of stuff. I’ve had enough experiences in my life that I can teach them that at home. I think this is going to have some very serious consequences”.

But not all parents feel the same. Sadie Trustowe gave her opinion: “I think it’s great! I mean, how many people actually took sex education on board? Putting a condom on a banana dates back to when I was at school! I’d much rather my Tommy learn about something current. Kids are exposed to peer pressure and drugs and partying at such a young age, and there’s only so much we can teach them as parents. If this programme helps him stay safe and build his awareness on the dangers of the sesh, I’m all for it!”

The Government are rolling the programme out across 13 schools in the UK before making it a firm fixture in the curriculum.

Schools To Swap Sex Education for Sesh Education
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